Our care should not be to have lived long as to have lived enough.
— Seneca

It was a too-busy day, in a good way. We sang two performances, I taught a beginning knitting class, wrote a handout… Dinner was served at 11pm.

It’s late, so I’m going to share 3 gratitudes and the quote above, and go to sleep. I teach a Sock-In-A-Day class tomorrow. It’s intense but fun.
——

Three new gratitudes (day 7 of 21):

• The opportunity to teach 4 women to knit, from the beginning.
• A satisfying new recipe twist on an “old” recipe.
• The fun experience of singing with Brian on a radio/TV show today as special Valentines Week guests. A wonderful perk of being musical and in love!

For local folks (Lansing, Michigan, USA), I want to get the word out on my upcoming activities. Often folks hear about my events after it’s too late to attend. I’m going to make this week right, anyway.

Tonight:
Friday, November 18. Shows 6:30 and 7:30 for about 1/2 hour each.

I will be dancing as “Eudora” with another dancer, at New Aladdins restaurant in Frandor. It’s across the entry street from Panera, near the video store. Great, home-made food. Family-owned, family-friendly restaurant specializing in mideastern/ Lebanese fare. It’s always a great time, I hope you can join us.

Saturday, November 19. Both classes at Rae’s Yarn Boutique, 2004 E. Michigan, a few doors west of Emil’s Italian restaurant and across from the Green Door. 336-YARN

Crystal Heels Class 12:00-2pm
This is an afterthought heel that actually fits a heel (rather than being shaped like a toe). I taught this class at Sock Summit in Portland, Oregon last August. You don’t need a plane ticket to learn this technique.

Buttons & Beads Bowls 2:30-4:30pm
This fun, felted bowl goes very fast on fat needles, and shrinks into a small bowl perfect for decorations, gifts, or loose pocket change. Decorate with buttons and/or beads, or make it in a multicolored yarn which needs no embellishment. Go home with a gift mostly finished.

Sunday, November 20. 1-3pm Foods for Living, East Lansing, Grand River at the end of Park Lake Rd. (East of Denny’s.) Employee-Locally-owned healthy food grocery.

Holiday Dessert Demo and Cookbook Sale I’ll be bringing my cookbook and samples of holiday desserts. Vegan pumpkin pie (no eggs or milk). Gluten-free muffins. Allergy-friendly goodies! Tell your friends, and come out for a sample. The cookbook is a great holiday gift. It’s also a lifesaver for those cooking for loved ones with restrictions during this season of relationship.

A Strong Woman

I have long been fascinated by Martha Graham, modern dance pioneer. I studied Modern Dance in high school, with a woman who had danced in some sort of capacity through Martha (I assume at her school).

Reading about Ms. Graham has been riveting. She was not vanilla-flavored! I believe if I met her in person I would have been afraid of her. However, those of us with a “strong flavor” do tend to make a mark on those around us.

From PBS.org:

Martha Graham’s impact on dance was staggering and often compared to that of Picasso’s on painting, Stravinsky’s on music, and Frank Lloyd Wright’s on architecture.

Transformation

Martha Graham changed the course of dance in one very long lifetime. When her body became too old and frail to dance any more, she spent about a year holed up in her room.

When she came out, she became a full-focus choreographer, sometimes teaching other dancers to dance roles she had created for herself. She had to re-invent herself, and in the end she triumphed.

Art as Writing

Martha hung out with another dancer/choreographer, Agnes DeMille, who worked most in musical theatre/ Broadway. They were in the same field but not directly competitive.

Agnes wrote my favorite words about Ms. Graham. She wrote a biography titled “Martha.” It’s not sugar coated at all, but it’s not mean either. It made me laugh, cringe, and open my eyes in amazement. I’m really grateful for that book, which I’ve read twice.

Wisdom

At some point, Martha wrote a letter to Agnes. Somehow it got transcribed in a public space, where other creatives could be encouraged by the words.

A long quote from that letter has been an amazing help to me at times. What I read into it is this: don’t worry about perfection, just DO THE WORK you were meant to do, the work you do which nobody else can. (There is no such thing as perfect anyway, right?)

So often, creative people think what they do is no big deal. It’s easy for them… but not for others. This does make it a big deal, if you ask me. On the other hand, they sometimes fuss so long making it perfect that they never release their work to the world.

Here is the quote which has really informed my creative life for years:

There is a vitality, a life-force, a quickening that is translated through you into action; and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.

And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium, and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is; nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares to other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.

You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.

Keep the channel open… No artist is pleased…

There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching – and makes us more alive than the others.
Martha Graham
(to Agnes DeMille)

===

From PBS.org’s page about Martha Graham:

It is nearly impossible to track the influence of Martha Graham. Everyone from Woody Allen to Bette Davis cites her as a major influence. She is universally understood to be the twentieth century’s most important dancer, and the mother of modern dance.
…She was the first choreographer to regularly employ both Asian- and African-American Dancers. Her contributions to the art of stage design and dance production are countless.

===

My friends… keep marching, keep creating, keep noticing joy – or blessed unrest if that’s what you’ve got. Do it in spite of yourself, do it even if the neighbors won’t understand, do it even if your parents think it won’t help you make a good living.

Fit your creative needs into your already too-busy life. You might just feel relieved from allowing yourself that time… to be yourself. Hugs.

A Passionate Subject

I got off on a rant last night with a bunch of dance friends. After an enlightening session with Sandi Amorim of Deva Coaching, who noticed strength in my voice as I discussed things for which I had true passion, I think I should share that constructive rant here with you.

Any time you have a few dozen women, there will always have a few in painful change. Our dance troupe is one of those groups. I told some of the dancers how powerful it was for me when I learned I could rescue myself. I’ve noticed some of the women in our group learning to rescue themselves, too.

Powerful Stuff in My Life

I know how to jump a car battery. In fact, since I have a habit of turning on my car lights even in the middle of the day, I may be considered an expert at jumping a car. It doesn’t take strength. It takes knowing how and getting it done.

I know how to change a tire. I really don’t enjoy getting dirty, but I love getting at my problem right away instead of sitting and feeling helpless while I wait for someone (a friend, a stranger, the AAA tow truck) to come and fix it for me.

My father, who was emphatically NOT a feminist, made me learn to change a tire (1972) before I could sign up for drivers’ education. He was wise. He wanted me strong, not a victim.

The last time I changed my tire it took me 22 minutes total. I was in charge of how it went. I didn’t love it, but since I was running early that day I was only about 5 minutes late to my destination. I’ve waited for a lot of tow trucks that took over an hour. The power of doing it myself was much bigger in my heart than having the comfort of someone else doing the labor.

There are still things I don’t want to do, things I will hire done if at all possible. There are things where I just plain need someone else to help out. However, I can sit there and wait for someone to notice the damsel in distress, or I can go ask the safest, most competent person in my circle if they would assist me.

Unwise Help

Once I let a boss (a very friendly and cool guy) help me jump my car. This was at least 15 years ago… well, he didn’t know how to do it but he acted like he did. He nearly blew up both of our cars until I hesitantly pointed out the need for change. ACK! Now I am triple-sure that the more I know about hiccups that *will* indeed happen in my life, the more I can assist my own rescue.

Now I ask people if I can please borrow the battery on their car. I tell them I have cables, I know exactly what I’m doing, I do it far too much because of an odd behavior quirk (lights on every day even when unneeded), and I just need to borrow a battery for a few minutes. They are relieved to not be the rescuer. I’m relieved to get the job done REALLY fast and be done with it.

I’m a little embarrassed every time I leave my lights on, but thanks to cool folks wherever I seem to go, it’s nearly a non-issue. (I carry gardening gloves in my car all the time now, and that way I get going without dirty hands. More minor rescue stuff, there.)

Big Rescues

Car hiccups are a small thing, really. It’s when you find yourself in a really wrong place in life that rescuing oneself is more important, and more difficult to imagine.

I have one friend who made a huge change 0n behalf of her toddler. She may not have been able to do the hard work of a new life had it been just herself to rescue. Many women turn into tigers when something goes wrong involving their child. I honor that inner tiger in each mother.

One Personal Victory

My worst times were 20 years ago now. I’d shriveled up into a tiny emotional ball of trying not to be hurt, trying not to need anything, trying to stay out of the way. It seemed every time the real Lynn came out, I was scolded or shamed for the life which came out with her. I remember the feelings more than the incidents.

In the end I walked away from the house where I thought I’d retire (and the marriage which those plans included). I sold that house, and bought a smaller, humble house FOR MYSELF. Without any co-signer.

Just a few years before that I’d given up credit cards and other unsecured debt. That action turned things around enough that I was actually able to buy that house for ME!

In some countries, women are property. In this country, I was one of the tiny minority of women who owned property in their own name. This victory is not lost on me.

I just found this quote:

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. “I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” You must do the thing you think you cannot do. – Eleanor Roosevelt

I just LOVE Eleanor Roosevelt. She was very shy when she was first married. In the end, she learned to STAND TALL. She changed the world by the time she was done with this life.

Once we rescue ourselves the first time… we know we can do the thing we once thought we could not do.

(The photos are of me as my persona Eudora, dancing with the Habibi Dancers of Lansing. Becoming a “belly” dancer gave me a love for my strong, female inner and physical selves. Don’t mess with a group of women! It may look strange from the outside, but from the inside it’s a strong female family of choice.)

Go forth. Be bold. Stand tall. Rescue yourself, even if that means calling for (safe, kind) help.

Incredible acoustic musician Lil Rev plays at Altu’s Ethiopian Cuisine in East Lansing tonight, 6:30-8:30.

Rev has won multiple awards, plays multiple instruments, is a fine storyteller and music historian. Highly recommended!

No cover, great food, CD’s for sale, tips appreciated.

http://EatAtAltus.com

(View of Convention Center from the parking ramp of the hotel where I stayed.)

After dinner Friday, I headed over to the convention center to join the Sock Hop. I entered a dark room with a disco mirror ball and loud ’80’s music. It was hard to see who was there. I sort of danced around the room by myself and took a bunch of photographs while I waited for my eyes to adjust better.

It turned out that dear friend Irene, who made Sock Summit a stop on her move from Michigan to the Pacific Northwest, was there with her friend Lisa. I sat with them a while in between taking photographs.

I sure enjoyed the playlist of the music at that party. I was a young adult during the 80’s and in the middle of a group of young men, in particular, who adored the new sounds. They loved Talking Heads, Elvis Costello, 10cc and a lot of other bands I don’t remember names of.

In recent years I’ve been loving The Cars more and more, and an assortment of other bands which first came out in those heady years of early MTV. That night they also played a bunch of Madonna and of course, Michael Jackson.

Socknitters are fun. I dare say the folks are just as fun at Sock Summit as at Ukulele Festivals, except that there were a lot more people at the Summit than I’ve ever seen at any individual Ukulele Festival.

There was a group of women who wore tiaras and tutus/crinoline skirts most or all of the weekend (see above). There were the folks wearing the pseudo-viking hats with socks instead of horns (seen in this post).

I took two videos I’ll share with you, at this party. Both are stored at Flickr.com so if you click here, you will end up on my Flickr pages. Click the “back” button to come on back and view the second video.

The first one is the group practicing for Saturday’s “Flash Mob” dance. It’s only 40 seconds here, but you can see how much fun a little dancing with a skein of yarn can really be. That is, if you’re a socknitter at the Sock Summit Sock Hop, anyway!

The second video is a MUST-SEE. This woman and a few of her friends were dancing to the end of Thriller (Michael Jackson) where Vincent Price is reciting scary poetry. I wish I could give credit to the amazing dancer here, but I don’t know who she is.

WOW. The video is barely over a minute, but long enough to really appreciate her total immersion into the spirit of the dance. Incredible.

Even Hot for Me, and I Love Summer

It’s been hot enough here in Lansing, Michigan this week to slow us down a good deal. There were a few days when the City offered “cooling centers” where folks without air conditioning at home, could go so they would not overheat.

On Thursday, I took this photograph of the thermometer in my kitchen. To be fair, when the sun shines it gives a falsely-high outdoor temperature, but it was pushing 100F anyway. (For non-US readers, this is equivalent to 32C indoors /44C out.)

Clothing as Art

A few days earlier, it was warmer than most like it (but I love heat, as a general rule). I hand washed a lot of my African dresses. They are so beautiful, and so colorful! I just had to take a photo.

Notice that most of them have some sort of handwork on them. Some are hand-dyed, some hand-embroidered (or embroidered with a machine that is hand controlled).

If you have read my blog much, you know that I believe that art is everywhere. You can see artful expression in the funky old kitchen items above, and particularly in the textiles shown below.

Practicality does not minimize the artfulness in my mind! It just means that these items will wear out faster than a painting on a wall.

Roll call from front to back:

1. Purple/blue Kenyan tunic, purchased in Nairobi, Kenya. Hand-dyed fabric, hand-controlled machine embroidery.
2. Green/Pink Kenyan long tunic, purchased in Mombasa, Kenya. hand-dyed, hand-controlled machine embroidery.
3. Moroccan-style dress, made in Canada, purchased on Ebay. Hand-controlled embroidery, machine-made braid.
4. Dress of unknown African origin. Purchased in Lansing at a wonderful Mideast/African/Indian clothing store on the corner of East Michigan Avenue and Foster, half a block from Foster Community Center, same corner as Quality Dairy and Blimpies. Commercially printed commercial fabric, machine sewn.
5. Dress from “Democratic Republic of” Congo. Purchased from an American woman born in Congo (parents were missionaries) but living here, who imports items here to sell and help loved ones make a living there, fair trade. High quality factory-made printed cotton, machine sewn, machine embroidered. One piece of the embroidery looks as if it was generated by a computer-programmed sewing machine.
6. Long dress from Kenya, purchased same place in Nairobi, with same attributes as Tunic #1.
7. Two Ethiopian dresses, purchased on Ebay from the same seller, last fall. The dresses include white cotton which is hand-spun, and the fabric is hand woven. The side seams usually are machine sewn although this white one is hand stitched. They typically use synthetic threads for colors so that color does not run in the wash. The embroidery in Ethiopia, at least all that I have, is hand-worked.I feel so honored to own textiles of this type! I must say, though… the writing is on the wall that it will be less available over the years. Also, the quality of the dresses I bought in Ethiopia in 2004-2005 (and gift dresses I’ve received from Ethiopian friends more recently) is better than that I can find online.

I even have more African dresses than this. I love them in summer. If you must go out in heat, they create your own shade. In addition, they don’t fit tightly so allow breezes to blow and cool you down.

They are an excellent design! Trust me, shorts and a tank top wrap you like a blanket and don’t protect you from the sun. These are the best, ever. And a woman walking down the street in flowing fabric? Fabulous.

Music and Video as Art

If you have read this far, I want to offer you a musical send-off. This video appears to be mid-1970’s (before MTV and the proliferation of videos). We looked like this when I was in High School… yup. We did.

It’s Mungo Jerry singing “In the Summertime” which is a sticky tune… it may stay in your head all day, and I expect you won’t mind at all! When you click on this, it will take you to a YouTube page. Happy humming!

Brian and I have had a busy week with our musical act, The Fabulous Heftones. We sang at a private luncheon on Tuesday. Here’s a photo of us at that event:

Friday we were on the radio (WLNZ 89.7 FM) in the morning for one song, then at the new City Market for the lunch hour (also on the radio). From 2-4 we sang at Foods for Living, a favorite healthy-food grocery in East Lansing (love them- they are employee-owned now, too).

Today/Saturday, we return to our “home venue.” We sing at Altu’s Ethiopian Cuisine in East Lansing (for locals, this is on Michigan Ave., between Frandor and Harrison Rd.). If you are interested in hearing us but not sure what Ethiopian food is like, you can read their food “Frequently Asked Questions” web page.

I hope to see a few of you there! It’s much more fun with friends in the audience. If we haven’t met in person before, please introduce yourself.

Relationship Celebration

Saturday we attended a wedding reception which was lovely. The space was beautiful, the company was spectacular, the music wonderful. However, it was *HOT* outside.

Brian remembers the groom as a baby. I met him when he was a young teen or tween. What a nice young man he is now. He’s good company and a good musician. I wish them all happiness, all the time.

A Great Gathering

At the reception, we got great food and plenty of water to drink. We all drank water through the day, but even so I got too much of my beloved summer heat.

By the time we got home, I didn’t feel well. I drank a lot more water, ate a little, and slept just about forever. Heat can give me headaches, and I just had to slow down.

A Cooling-Off Treat

SO: Sunday I went to the food Co-Op. They have Stonyfield Farms vanilla ice cream, the only ice cream I’ve found with ingredients I can eat (no eggs, potato starch or xanthan gum). It’s a luxury product, one that even kings could not have at one time.

I also got some organic milk and organic whipping cream. Organic Valley brand (it’s a co-op) whipping cream works for me. (It’s just cream and carrageenan, a thickener made from seaweed… totally natural. Some whipping cream has “natural” preservatives in it.) We always keep organic frozen strawberries in the house.

Not Taking this for Granted

It was a very big day when I realized I could have a homemade strawberry shake even with all my allergies. I did not eat any dairy for 5 years, so ice cream is a big treat.

When I was a child, most places with ice cream offered only vanilla, or maybe vanilla and chocolate. If I was very lucky, I could order strawberry. I think I liked it best because it was a prettier color, to be honest… although I’m not a huge chocolate person even now.

So Sunday I made all-organic strawberry shakes with fresh-whipped-cream (sweetened with brown sugar, my favorite). We both had one, and it was a lovely treat.

I’m grateful that it’s summerlike, finally.

I’m grateful for friends and happy relationships.

I’m grateful for time to rest and cool off on Sunday.

I’m delighted and grateful, that I can eat such high-quality foods. Yes, this is luxury. Gourmet!

Here is the last photo I took on Mighty Uke Day:

We crashed Emil’s Italian Restaurant on Lansing’s fine East Side. They were A-OK with us having a quiet jam session. It turned out that the other customers found us pleasant company, there were smiles galore throughout.

I grabbed my camera to take a photo, and I accidentally started a video. When I realized it, I kept the camera on. You can join us for the last chorus of “Show Me the Way to Go Home,” here:

Jam

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve suggested a large group go to Emil’s late in the day (their kitchen closes at 11), and they always are welcoming. It was a very fun time. They even brought out a tray full of chocolate Mousse desserts on the house, which several people enjoyed.

The Day

We had a very fun time at Mighty Uke Day on Saturday, in Old Town Lansing. The Sir Pizza was absolutely packed, and there were many fine acts. We were honored to be on the calendar.

As seems to be the case, when music is involved we see all of Lansing. During that day I saw friends from Working Women Artists, #LoveLansing Twitter folks, Knitting, Kid Knitters, Allen Street Market, Contra Dancing… and even Brian’s family (his dad and brother came in from Grand Rapids). I even saw a belly dance friend on the way in to the pizza place. It was wonderful.

I must comment on the fine performance by Magdalen Fossum, age 10. Let me tell you… this young lady grew up in a performance space/cafe named after her. (Remember Magdalena’s Teahouse?)

She has been playing uke a long time. She loves playing music for crowds, and can be found at every outdoor festival she can find… dressed to perform, and singing her heart out all day long. She’s well-practiced and well-seasoned as a performer for real audiences, even at this age. Here’s a photo:

I loved her singing “Runaway,” it was magnificent. Her voice is much more expressive than some adults. And friends, she does a mouth trumpet. I’m impressed, and jealous. This young lady is going places.

We sang a well-received set, with a delightful surprise. Andy Wilson of Steppin’ in It was there (he and Juliana Tuell did a wonderful sort of 30’s-40’s jazzy set just before we went on). He joined us on our encore number, “Your Baby Ain’t Sweet Like Mine.” Brian has a YouTube Video of that song – click the link  if you want to hear it.

Here’s a photo of us with Andy from a hot summer’s day in August, 2007. That night we were at Dagwood’s (also on the East Side) for open mic night. One more oldie-goodie in my beloved Lansing!

Between the concert and the jam session, we viewed The Mighty Uke Movie. It was just incredible. Excellent. Funny… informative, and at times a tearjerker. We knew lots and lots of the people in the movie, from our travels to and from Ukulele Festivals all over the midwest & New York.

This is exciting! It is a full day of ukulele music.

We are at Sir Pizza in Old Town Lansing listening to a lot of fun and talented musicians. We (The Fabulous Heftones) will play at about 6:15 or 6:30 for about a half hour.

After our performance, we walk across the side street to 1210 Turner, to watch The Mighty Uke, a documentary about the resurgence of ukulele fans. It shows a lot of West Coast performers.

Movie admission is $10 but concert is free. Lansing, consider stopping out.

Morning Singing
Lansing friends: We (Brian and I, The Fabulous Heftones) are performing Saturday 4/30/2011, at Foods For Living in East Lansing (almost to Okemos) on Grand River Avenue.

Our performance is from 10a-noon. This store is across the street and just east of Coral Gables Restaurant. They are having a huge truckload sale- it should be quite a festive scene.

Dinner Serenade
Then later, from 6:30 – 8:30pm, we will be returning to our home venue, Altu’s Ethiopian Cuisine. It is at 1312 Michigan, East Lansing (east of Frandor & west of Harrison, on the north side of the road).

It would be great to sing for you, if you are in town. See you soon?

Quick Earth Day Event announcement for folks in the Greater Lansing (MI) area:

We (Brian and I, The Fabulous Heftones) are performing today, Friday 4/22/2011, at Foods For Living in East Lansing (almost to Okemos) on Grand River Avenue.

Our performance is from 2-4pm. (I believe there will be other musicians there after us.) This store is across the street and just east of Coral Gables Restaurant. Park Lake Road dead-ends into their parking lot.

This healthy-food grocery store is employee owned and well run with great merchandise. We love to shop there, we love to sing there. It’s all good, and we are thrilled to be back. It promises to be a bustling place for Earth Day!

There is no cover, just shop and listen. It’s not a concert venue, more of a thank you to their customers. We would like to thank Jason for asking us to return. Fun!!!

I’ve always danced. I have practiced many different types of dance over the years… ballet, modern, jazz, tap, theater. I was always good enough to be part of a team on stage, but never was good enough to solo.

Now I’m a “belly dancer” (with the Habibi Dancers of Lansing, Michigan), and I’m good enough to solo at times. I started at age 38, just after I married the love of my life (we’ve been married 14 yrs and still crazy about each other).

I have found that in making my hips visible across the room, I now love my female-ness as I never did. You can’t shimmy without making friends with your hips (and peace with being female). On top of that, seeing other women be beautiful in this way helps one appreciate one’s own womanhood.

(I am still not quite comfortable with the word feminine, though… which is sad. I still see it as fluffy and frilly and perhaps even powerless. I might as well own my roadblocks while I’m discussing this.)

There is nothing like a group of 30 women shaking that thing, to find out what the positive power of being female can be. A great part of this dance culture is that we often tell other dancers how lovely they look, how much their dancing pleases us.

Everyone rocks it in a different way, for sure. But when one of our team is in trouble, you should see the power of the crowd rallying behind her.

Yes, in March, when the world gets grumpy and miserable until spring hits… we are working on our biggest production of the year. There are extra rehearsals, and costumes to sew, not enough time and nerves to soothe. We whine and complain together and (unfortunately) sometimes at each other. But when push comes to shove, I know who’s got my back.

I love my community of dancers. I love the joy of dancing, the ease and fun of moving to music in a way that pleases me and those around me.

Being female was not always something I felt good about. With this dance, I have not only made peace with my womanhood, but embraced it.

…and the costumes sure are fun, too!